“Stop Looking at My Nuts!” Squirrel Athletic Shorts – Funny Graphic Performance Shorts

Bold, ridiculous, and guaranteed to get a reaction—the “Stop Looking at My Nuts!” shorts don’t take themselves too seriously. Featuring a cartoon squirrel guarding its stash, this design leans all the way into chaotic humor while still delivering high-performance comfort.

Made with lightweight, four-way stretch microfiber fabric, these shorts are built for movement, whether you’re working out, running errands, or just lounging. The water-repellent finish and moisture-wicking properties help keep you dry, while the breathable construction and anti-chafe mesh liner add all-day comfort. An elastic waistband with an adjustable drawcord ensures a secure fit, and multiple pockets (including a hidden inner pocket) keep your essentials close.

Perfect for anyone who likes their activewear with a side of humor.

Features:

• 91% recycled polyester, 9% spandex
• Lining: polyester/spandex blend (varies by region)
• Lightweight fabric (5.13 oz./yd² / 174 g/m²)
• Four-way stretch, water-repellent microfiber
• Anti-chafe mesh inner liner
• Elastic waistband with adjustable drawcord
• Mesh side pockets + small hidden inside pocket
• UPF 50+ sun protection
• Blank product sourced from China

Comfortable, functional, and just inappropriate enough to stand out.

Size guide